I know the secret to feeling good, increased resilience, better sleep, a happier outlook on life and an overall improved sense of well-being. Its benefits are well-proven. I know how to do it. It doesn’t take much time. It’s free. I’ve done it in the past. But I don’t do it. Given all the I know, I’m curious why I wouldn’t utilize this elixir of well-being, meditation. It makes no sense.
About six years ago, I took a meditation class. It was the Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) Program developed by Jon Kabat-Zinn. Our homework was regular meditation, yoga and mindfulness during our days. Meditating at home felt weird, but I always do my assignments. Instead of telling my husband I was going to meditate, I would tell him that I was going to do my homework.
I felt the benefits almost immediately. I began looking at the world with amazement. I was startled by the beauty surrounding me on my walks. It felt like I was walking inside a large diorama. The sky was bluer; the grass was greener. I enjoyed my food more. I took setbacks in stride. I was more affectionate and cheerful. I slept better.
After meditating regularly for a few years, I gradually meditated less and less. Eventually, I stopped. I had more anxiety, I slept less well and felt like I was on a treadmill. But the changes happened gradually. I felt too impatient and hurried to begin meditating again. I thought that I didn’t have time for that!
Several months after my mom was originally diagnosed with cancer in 2014, I took a one-month meditation tune-up class. My mom’s prognosis was poor and I wanted to get my feet on the ground as much as possible to brace myself for the future. After our initial meditation at our first class, we introduced ourselves and told each other why we were there. I broke down and sobbed almost uncontrollably as I told the group that my mom had finished radiation, but I didn’t know if she had 2 more months to live or two years or more. (It ended up being one year.)
As our first class ended, our wise teacher told us that our homework was to meditate 40 minutes/day. We could break it up into two 20 minutes sessions and do it whenever we wanted. As she told us this, I thought to myself, “40 minutes every day!? There’s no *#%! way I’m doing that.”
The next morning, I was on a walk and thinking about the class and the assignment. I went to the class for a reason and I wanted the results. But I wasn’t ready to do the work? Hmm…this didn’t add up. Why would I take the class if I wasn’t willing to do what the teacher wanted us to do?
I decided to try an experiment and comply with the assignment for a week. If it was horrible, I could quit after one week. But a meditation experiment seemed harmless enough. And it’s incredibly hard for me not do my homework.
The benefits were remarkable. Within a couple of days, I began to feel durable. I could take what life threw at me in stride. One morning I had to get up at 3:45 AM for an early flight. I normally feel awful this early in the morning. Unbelievably, I felt fine. I didn’t feel sick with fatigue. My husband even wrote me a sweet note, asking me to please not stop meditating! I was nicer to him and more affectionate.
I continued this meditation practice for months and eventually began to meditate less. I now meditate infrequently and don’t make it a priority. Yet, I want to feel good, especially after the tough year I’ve had. I want to have the most sunshiny outlook on life I can. I know the secret. And yet I don’t partake.
I suppose that many people know of a habit that makes them feel good and improves their health: getting enough sleep, eating nutritious food and exercising. And they don’t do it. Perhaps it’s because initiating a new habit is difficult.
Nobody can make me meditate. Perhaps this is why I’m writing this entry – I’m trying to talk myself into meditating regularly! It might be time for another experiment with meditation.
We’ll see if it works. I’ll let you know.
11 Comments
I lie to trick myself and meditate for two minutes. It usually feels so good I add minutes at a time????
Good approach. Getting started is the hardest part!
I recently listened to a presentation on dealing with “Self Defeating Behaviors” (SDB’s)
It’s different than meditation, but similar in that both can be very fruitful. I bet the two, side by side, could be powerful in one’s life. The presentation I recently went to encouraged us take a look at behaviors we might be stuck in. Maybe there are some things we do day after day that are not fruitful, but could be turned around. After reading these good words from you, I am thinking ……Meditate to clear the mind, to lower stress, and to be more mindful of the wonders all around us……and also check to see if there might be some SDB’s to turn around. Thank you, Jenny! I think I’ll begin with 5 minutes of meditation each morning. Will let you know how that goes!
(The SDB I thought of this week involves my glasses. I bet I spend at least 15-20 minutes a day looking for my reading glasses! I am now wearing them around my neck. No more stress looking for my glasses!)
love hearing about someone else struggling with doing something they know will help them. I think it’s only me & laziness. I struggle with my 10 min headspace meditation most days!
It’s so not easy, even when one knows the results are worth it. I think this is what motivated Gretchen Rubin to write her book on habits. If one can make a good activity a habit, then you’re set. No more stopping and starting.
Yep! I too have felt the powerful affects of meditation, yet I never seem to follow through on a regular basis. But after reading this I vow to try, once again, to develop the habit…and to stick with it!
Wonderful! It’s so difficult to do regularly, but the benefits are massive. (Keep reminding me of this, please. 🙂
Inspired by this blog, I began meditating again two mornings ago. (I have meditated before with my dear friends Jacquie and Mary.) First thing, upon waking, I now sit on a chair in our living room which looks out to a field. For many years, we have called this field
‘A Field of Dreams’. So far, I have meditated for 5 minutes each morning, and the time goes so quickly. Tomorrow morning I am going to stretch the time to 13 minutes. The number 13 is standing out to me in very good ways, in my life.
I’m so glad that you’ve begun meditating!
meditating for 13 minutes…… because, afterall, the beautiful letter “A Common Word Between Us and You”, written by 138 Islamic leaders and sent to Christian leaders all over the world, was sent on October 13 (2007). We have more in common than what divides us. “They are us and we are them.”
Beautiful. I like how you tied the post about refugees and meditating together.